It's that time again

I'll be the first to admit it: I have a soft spot in my heart for the Use the Muse Contest. It was just about a year ago that the first one began; participating in it was a delight from beginning to end.

It was the first contest I'd ever entered, and I was really nervous about it; after I sent off my entry fee, I immediately began to have second thoughts.

And third thoughts.

And none of them were good thoughts.

I'd entered on a whim; several people had been telling me that it was time I started entering contests, and it looked like a fun one. Little did I know how much fun it would be! When the kit arrived, it had so many things that I'd never really used before; the number of crystals alone was overwhelming. I immediately resolved to use up as much of the kit as possible in my entry; this was not the time to be parsimonious. No stockpiling those pretty crystals to use later.

I had a ball making my entry. Who knew it would be so exciting to use materials chosen by someone else? In order to do what I wanted to do, I had to invent some new-to-me ways of beadweaving; that first Use the Muse entry has echoed her way through pretty much everything I've done over the past year. It had a huge impact on me; I love where it has taken me.

It's that time again; it's time to sign up for Use the Muse IV. February 25th is the last day to sign-up for a kit at the pre-order price of $30 (plus $5 shipping and handling) at The Beader's Muse.

See you there!

letting go

I finally told someone who has been taking advantage of me and treating me badly that I'd had enough. It wasn't an easy decision; I remember when this person was a delight to be with; I remember a lot of good times, and I miss them. I miss her; the fun, funny, lovable, incredible her; I miss her more than I can say.

But it's been many years since those days, and our relationship keeps getting worse. She shows no interest in changing her behavior, and I don't like the way she treats me. I never thought I would say this, but given the way she has chosen to live, I'm better off without her.

It's sad.

I won't close the door; if she ever decides to change, I would love to have her back in my life.

But not like this.

And so it goes

It's been a busy week. I've been taking a "gap week;" my lariat necklace took a lot of my time and energy, and I've been devoting myself to doing things that I let slide while I was netting.

Because of the recent rains, the weeds have grown like topsy in our yard; I've extended the Maginot Line a foot or two, and pushed the weeds back down the hill from my flower garden; it will take extreme vigilance to keep them from creeping back.

I've been thinking a lot, lately, about what is and what is not . . . and what I can create and what I can't. I think I love gardening and beading so much because I can create in those areas; given enough time and work I can make things that were not there before. Making things is, perhaps, my greatest joy.

Coupled with the joy that comes from creation is the sorrow of realizing that there are things I cannot make happen; I am not always able to focus on the joy, there are times with the sorrow overwhelms me. I guess I need to feel that part of it, too.

Even Jesus wept.